Having kids is a blessing that not all people get to have, but it also comes with certain factors that might put a marriage at risk. According to a research from the University of Denver, 90% of married couples reported that their satisfaction about their relationship went down after having a baby.
Experts have said that this reaction is possibly caused by the fact that parenting is one of the biggest challenges for any couple to take, and that nothing could ever prepare you for parenting life until you’ve experienced it yourself.
What you can do is to start babyproofing your relationship before you even plan on getting pregnant. This way, you will have a chance at protecting your relationship and keeping it stable despite facing tough parenting challenges in the future. But how should you do that?
Know How to Be Selfish
Once your kid is born, all your priorities will likely go out the window, replaced by your #1 priority – ensuring your kid’s well-being. You might even forget about your own needs, but remember that only happy parents are capable of raising a happy baby. Before the baby arrives, spend dates and weekends on your own.
Divide the Chores, Even the Smallest Ones
When baby duties occupy most of the day, you have to negotiate who does what – from changing the diapers to lulling the baby to sleep. Start assigning the household chores now, from the doing the laundry and folding them to cooking lunch and cleaning the house. Nitpick through everything to make you effective and efficient in completing chores.
Even if you’re still about to conceive your baby, it’s best to start negotiating about the baby duties now. Get right down the smallest details, your sleeping schedule, and even your nap times during the day.
Maintain a Healthy Sex Life
The lack of sex will reduce the oxytocin, or the “feel good hormone,” in your body, disconnecting you from your partner emotionally. This is the last thing your relationship needs if you want to prepare for the arrival of your little bundle of joy. Even constant cuddling, touching, and kissing will give you the intimacy and the satisfaction that it brings.
Decide on Your Work Schedules
You have to determine who will get to spend time with the baby during business hours and it would be safer to get this decision out of the way even before the baby is conceived. Take note of the impact having a baby would have on your financial resources and you’d know this is one of the most important steps in babyproofing your relationship.
Feel free to holler for help once you’re swamped with baby duties. Your little bundle can be pretty demanding, but know that you can ask the grandparents, a willing niece, or a neighbor looking for a part-time job to help you babysit.
Agreeing to Disagree Is the New Normal
Even the strongest union might balk at the pressure of having to make millions of parenting decisions. But you just need to settle the major ones, such as co-sleeping, breastfeeding, time with grandparents, or sleep training, and agree to disagree on other issues to make your life easier.
Express Your Gratitude
You’ll realize just how hardworking your partner is his or her list of baby duties are completed because you’re exerting as much effort in completing yours. Show your appreciation and say “thank you.” It goes a long way to make your partner feel valued.
Go On Dates
Spend as much time as you can with your partner before you become three. It’s common for couples to forget about dates or even spending some time during their baby’s first year or even longer, which wreaks havoc on the relationship. Make it a habit to get out regularly to stay happy and help you prepare you for the arrival of a little person that will change the rest of your lives forever.